Reflections on 2022

2022 was a huge year for me. There is no doubt about that. It was also a gift. It has been a year of change and a year of adventure and a year of growth. So many things have changed.

The year began with a trip to Queensland for a friend’s 18th, with a bunch of siblings and friends. We bush danced and zoomed around in a speed boat and went to a lake in the rain and I got sick and missed half the party and saw a wild snake and thought it was so cool. Then we came back to Victoria and got covid. Fun times.

I had a serious health crisis in March/April and spent a week in hospital. I also had to quit my disability support job as I was too unwell to work, which was pretty disappointing. I still think of my clients and wonder how they’re doing. The early months of last year were spent dealing with the crisis and finding a path of recovery.

We also sold our family home in Coldstream of fourteen years, around that time. A milestone and an end of an era. There were so many years of memories in that house, some good, some painful, and so much time shared together as a family and with friends.

In May, Dad, Hannah, and I went over to New Zealand to visit family- grandparents, cousins, etc. It was the first time Han and I had been back in nine years, so the visit was well overdue. If you would like to read about it, I wrote some stories about it on here.

The following months were spent packing up our house, getting rid of things, and packing up the container, in preparation for moving to Monte.

Then we moved to Drouin where we stayed for a month. You can read about that here.

Then myself and half my family flew out of Melbourne to Europe. 😀

We spent a few days in Frankfurt Germany and then flew to Podgorica, Montenegro. You can read about that here.

Then there were four amazing months in Montenegro. Exploring, having adventures, healing, growing, meeting new people and making new friends, learning about what it’s like living overseas, and thinking about what I would like for my future. I haven’t written much about Montenegro on here yet as it’s all sort of jumbled up in my mind and there’s so much I want to say! I’m not sure how to sort it all out!

It was too soon to come home!!!!! But, what could I do. You have to go where the work is. So, I flew back to Melbourne in December, stayed in Drouin again with friends over Christmas and New Years, before moving in with some other friends in Melbourne. Then, of course, my disability support job, the one I came back for, has fallen through…. so now what?

I feel like I grew and healed a lot last year. I have been through such darkness and pain… but through it I am learning, breaking, becoming stronger. It was a year of thinking through things and figuring out what I believe, from faith to politics. It was another year of pulling apart the false teachings I was taught in IBLP and figuring out what is true and how to live in God’s grace. I am growing and deepening in my understanding of the Gospel which blows legalism out of the water. I am learning to overcome my fear (a lot of those early teachings were sooo fear based) and anxiety, and to take my medications every day.

I stepped out of my fear when I did things that anxiety was screaming at me were frightening and dangerous. I stepped out of my fear when I stepped out of my introvert comfort bubble and met new people and made new friends in Monte. I stepped out of my fear when I went overseas knowing that it could all fall apart like things have before. I stepped out of my fear when I tried new things, like talking another language, and tour guiding on the Logos Hope. I have stepped out of my fear when I’ve faced the darkness and pain of depression and trauma without running from it. I’ve stepped out of my fear when I’ve got help and let others help me. Maybe fear has plagued me my entire life, but I’ve put my foot down and said, “No more”. I will be brave.

You have to face the dragon. Only then can you defeat him.

I’m not sure how we managed to squish so many major events into a single year! But we did. 😛 I am especially grateful for the chance to travel again… three times! Well, four if you count coming back to Melbourne. I am also grateful for new friendships and deepening old ones, for friends and family who stick with me no matter what. There is sadness in the change… selling our home and splitting our family between three different countries was rough. But closing one chapter means opening a new one and there’s hopefully far better things in there than any we leave behind.

Here’s to more growth, more adventure, and more grace in 2023! 😀